Accepting an apology. 04/02/2016

When someone apologizes to you for doing or saying something wrong, it can difficult to accept the apology. This could be because you are not sure if the apology is sincere or you need time to access and think about the apology. Once you make up your mind to accept the person's apology, you can do so with words and with actions. If the apology seems genuine and sincere, you should try to accept the apology and then act on that acceptance by practicing forgiveness.

1. Rely on your gut instinct.

For all the analysis you can do on a person's intentions, often your gut instinct can be a good gauge of whatever or not to trust and accept the person's apology. Take a moment to consider the apology and listen to your gut feelings and the person and her apology. Is your gut telling you the person is being honest and sincere? Do you have any feelings of doubt or confusion around the person and her apology to you?

2. Consider if you are ready to accept the person's apology.

Before you accept the apology, you may want to consider the context around the apology and how well you know the person. If it is a close friend who is apologizing for behaving badly towards you, and she has a history of this behavior, you may want to consider if she is using apologies as excuses for her actions. If a family member or partner is apologizing to you for something out of character and rare, you may be more amenable to accepting their apology.

3. Explain that your feelings were hurt.

Once you thank the person for her apology, you should make it clear that your feelings were hurt an be specific about how the person hurt you. This will indicate that you are being honest about your emotions and you are not being casual or flippant about the situation. You may say: "Thank you for apologizing. I was really hurt when you lied to me" or "I appreciate your apology, thank you. It hurt my feelings when you yelled at me in front of my parents.

4. Suggest spending quality time with the person.

Another way to put your forgiveness into action is to show the person that you accept her apology. Suggest spending quality time together to show the person that you accept her apology. Suggest spending quality time together to show the person you still enjoy her company and want to continue to be friends. You could plan an outing or an activity where you both have to work together and support each other, like a collaborative art class or playing a sport. This would show that you are willing to rebuild trust with the person and renew your relationship with her.

5. Be prepared if any issues or problems arise between you and the person again.

While you should commit yourself to trying to fully trust the person again, especially if she offers you a heartfelt apology and you accept it, you should also be on the look out for warning signs. These could be small moments that indicate the person may make the same mistake again or may be falling back into bad habits that could lead to an issue and the need for another apology. Try to steer the person away from making another mistake or hurting you again like she did before.